feels like the first time

first off, i must apologize for my ridiculously long absence. i have a few blog posts in the works though, so hopefully they'll make up for my recent blogging hiatus. in this particular post, i'd like to share some of my experiences from last week. enjoy!

last week was a week of firsts. not just any firsts, mind you, but firsts that really only come with living overseas as a foreigner. so here they are, in no specific order of preference or entertainment potential:

1. i saw my first nude sunbather. thankfully, they were on the other side of the riverbank. though i will say that my first thought was something akin to, "toto, we're not in kansas anymore."

2. i visited a grocery store that i'd always wondered about but had never set foot inside of, called lidl. if you've experienced aldi's in the states, then you've basically been to lidl. i was fortunate enough to make my visit during 'asian week,' aka hello cheap teriyaki sauce, sweet & sour sauce, and chow mein noodles week. yay!

3. i baked for the first time in the 9 months that i've lived overseas, which sounds like an eternity. i mean, really, that's enough time for a baby to bake in a belly oven. i made a delicious batch of m&m cookies. only they weren't really m&m cookies, seeing as i substituted the cheaper and more widely available czech version known as lentilky. and i'll let you in on a secret...though the peanut butter and almond varieties of m&ms will always hold a special place in my heart, i think lentilky are actually better than plain m&ms. the candy shell is just a smidge bit thicker, which creates quite a satisfying crunch. and there i go again, being the typical american and talking non-stop about food...the point of the story is that the cookies were quickly gobbled up by a room full of hungry teens at younglife klub, so i dare say that they were a success. next stop on the baking train is muffins. and heck, maybe i'll even go crazy and bake another batch of cookies before another 9 months goes by.

4. i went to another new place all by myself (twice in one week, i know!). this time, it was a local cafe right at one of the tram stops by my flat. i'd always wanted to go in, but trying out a new cafe just didn't seem like the thing to do alone. however, this day was especially sunshiney, i didn't have any obligations for hours, and i had a copy of jane austen's northanger abbey with me. so you see, there wasn't any good reason to delay my cafe adventure any longer. well, it turned out to be quite an adventure. i'd heard that they had chai tea, which isn't something you often find here, as the czech word for tea is pronounced exactly like chai, so if you ask for chai, you're basically asking for plain old tea. needless to say, i was brimming with excitement for real chai tea. however, i couldn't find it on the menu. instead of simply (though is it ever truly simple when you don't fluently speak the language?) asking if they had chai tea, i thought maybe it was called something else on their menu. i found another item with tea in the name, and the price looked to be what i'd imagine, so i ordered it. i should have known that something wasn't quite right when the waitress asked me if i wanted it warm or normal, but i didn't want to seem like the ignorant foreigner, so i said normal and went back to my book. but as i looked over to watch her make it and saw her reach for a bottle of alcohol, i knew that i'd made a huge mistake. not that tea with alcohol would necessarily be awful, but it wasn't what i wanted, especially at 10am. of course, when i'm under stress, the tiny amount of czech i do know goes completely out the window. i should have been able to say something like, "i'm sorry, that isn't what i wanted. do you have chai tea? yes? i'd like that, please. thank you." however, what actually came out was more like, "no, no, no. ugh...i'm sorry, ugh, but no. ugh, do you have chai tea?" in other words, i totally failed in not looking like an ignorant foreigner. but never fear, in the end, i was able to get the chai tea that i'd been looking forward to. though i will admit, i think i'll wait a few weeks before showing my face there again.

5. i had american bacon for the first time since...august? boy oh boy, it was delicious. bacon is the number one reason why i could never become a permanent vegetarian. on this oh so special day, i also had homemade biscuits and gravy and waffles (courtesy of lidl) with peanut butter and syrup. it was a good day for my stomach.

6. i got my first mosquito bites of the season. not just one of course...more like ten. and let me tell you, czech mosquitos are vicious. i'm truly convinced they are some sort of evolved, mutant machine of evil. the bites are huge and red, and they stick around for ages. yay summer!

so there you have it. a seemingly normal week of my life in ostrava, but with a few more firsts than usual. i hope they brought you a chuckle or two :)

31,536,000 seconds

One year = 365 days, which = 8760 hours, which = 525,600 minutes, which = 31,536,000 seconds (assuming it's not a leap year). No, I'm not giving you a math lesson. I'm simply trying to break down the additional amount of time that I've dedicated to God's work in the Czech Republic. That's right, I've decided to stay in Ostrava, Czech Republic for another year.

Those of you who know me well know that I do not make big decisions lightly. Heck, I have been known to stand in the hair product aisle at Walmart for a ridiculous amount of time just because I can't make the seemingly simple choice of which shampoo and conditioner to purchase. Needless to say, the decision to stay overseas for another year was not a snap decision. I miss my family and friends, my dog, and the numerous comforts and familiarities that I took for granted in the snuggly, warm bubble of home. However, God has made it very apparent that my time here is not up yet. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to make it sound like I feel that I have to stay...I love it here and I want to stay for as long as possible. While my contract with TeachOverseas is only one year at a time, I really don't want to put a time stamp on my life here. I want to be here for as long as God allows.

God is doing some major work in the hearts and minds of the youth I work with in Ostrava, and I'm constantly amazed that He chooses to use someone imperfect like me to help build His kingdom. I am so excited to continue the relationships that I've started this year with my students and the youth at younglife. In regards to the potential of staying here for more than two years, I have no idea what His long-term plans are, but I know that they are perfect. In fact, I found a quote recently that seems quite fitting: "If we can trust God with our eternity, we've gotta trust Him with our now." Perhaps it seems obvious, but I think it's a great daily reminder that God cares about our day to day life, not just where we end up when this life is over.

I Will Bring Praise

I've recently had a song on my heart. It's Desert Song by Hillsong. Perhaps you've heard it. If not, I strongly recommend giving it a listen. The lyrics are powerful, yet simple.

This is my prayer in the desert

When all that's within me feels dry

This is my prayer in my hunger and need

My God is a God who provides.

And this is my prayer in the fire

In weakness or trial or pain

There is a faith proved of more worth than gold

So refine me Lord through the flame.

I will bring praise, I will bring praise

No weapon formed against me shall remain

I will rejoice, I will declare

God is my victory and He is here.

This is my prayer in the battle

When triumph is still on its way

I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ

So firm on His promise I'll stand.

I will bring praise, I will bring praise

No weapon formed against me shall remain

I will rejoice, I will declare

God is my victory and He is here.

All of my life, in every season

You are still God

I have a reason to sing

I have a reason to worship.

I will bring praise, I will bring praise

No weapon formed against me shall remain

I will rejoice, I will declare

God is my victory and He is here.

And this is my prayer in the harvest

When favor and providence flow

I know I'm filled to be emptied again

The seed I've received I will sow.

When I think about the lyrics to this song, I am both challenged and encouraged. I don't know about you, but praising God in the crummy times of life is never easy for me. When it seems like nothing goes right (or at least the way I want it to), my first instinct is to lick my wounds or feel sorry for myself. However, this song challenges me to praise God no matter what the situation is like, whether in the desert, fire, battle, or harvest. Notice that it mentions only one "happy" or comfortable situation...and that's at the end. As Christians, we are going to endure trials and suffering. We are going to be put into uncomfortable situations, and those experiences are for a greater purpose that we might never understand. But no matter what experience God brings us through, He is there with us the whole time and deserves our praise.

I love the part of the song where it says "God is my victory and He is here." HERE, as in, He is present. How awesome and encouraging it is to know that my Lord, my creator, is here with me. He isn't some distant being that pushes me around like a figurine in the game of LIFE and watches to see what happens. He knows my trials and pain just as He knows my hopes and dreams. He knows these things because he is not just watching; He is here, He is present.

I hope the words of this song challenge and encourage your heart as they have mine.

A Different Kind of Makeover

Happy New Year! In light of celebrating the change from 2010 to 2011, I have given my blog a bit of a face-lift. The change in year seemed like an appropriate time for tweaking, which brings me to my thought for the day: Makeovers.

Makeovers are popular. People (usually women) get bored with how they look or want to freshen-up their look. This is especially popular after the New Year. In fact, I don't think I can remember a time when I went back to school or work after the holidays and didn't see visible changes that people had made. These changes were usually in the realm of hair length or color. Are makeovers a problem? Of course not! I quite enjoy makeup, and I happen to have two boxes of semi-permanent haircolor in my closet...

However, since it is the time of New Years resolutions, I can't help but think about how much focus we put on our image. Diet and exercise plans typically top the list of most popular New Years resolutions (which, let's face it, are usually short-lived) and you can find countless articles on ways to spruce up your look--be it with clothes, makeup, hairstyles, jewelry, etc. Now, maybe you don't put a lot of thought or effort into your appearance. Maybe you don't wear any sort of makeup, take much time to fix your hair, and have never made any diet or exercise goals. Good for you. I admire you...as I am a member of the majority of people who put too much thought and effort into their appearance.

Therefore, my goal (or resolution, if you will) for 2011 is to put LESS focus on my outsides, and MORE focus on my insides. No, I'm not talking about taking vitamins or trying to eat more heart-healthy foods. When I say my insides, I mean my mind and my heart. I want to focus on clearing out all the junk that has taken up residence in these parts so that they might better reflect Christ. In place of all that junk, I want to fill my mind and heart with content that is holy and pleasing to God. Philippians 4:8 says, "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things."

This is my new goal. Does it mean I should throw out my makeup? No, but it means that I will be spending less time in the mirror and more time in the Word.

camouflage

i've been in czech for 4 months now, and while i love my parents, friends, and church family back in indiana, my heart is here in ostrava. you might say that being in central europe for a year lends itself to amazing travel opportunities, and while yes, it does, i have found that i don't really want to travel much. in fact, i haven't even been out of the czech republic yet. europe has always held a special place in my heart, and after studying french for 5 years, it has always been a dream of mine to travel all throughout france. greece, hungary, croatia, ireland, england, spain, portugal, belgium, germany, poland, austria, and a trip back to italy are all on my list of places in europe that i deeply desire to visit. but my ministry isn't in any of those places. it's here. in ostrava. in 90% of those other countries, i have no friends to visit...only landmarks. my relationships are here, so why would i want to spend my time anywhere else?

one thing i love about ostrava is that it is not touristy at all. sure, there are postcards available in certain shops, and i've even seen an ostrava calendar. but unlike prague, where there are souvenir shops on every corner and nearly everyone speaks english, ostrava doesn't cater to tourists, especially in terms of the english language. in fact, unless i am around one of the other americans, in class, or hanging out with my czech friends, i rarely hear anyone speaking english. i'm so used to not understanding other conversations around me that when i hear english spoken outside of those situations, it's the strangest feeling. a few weeks ago, i was in my favorite cafe with one of my czech friends, and two guys sat down at a table near us and started speaking english. i became so distracted that trying to maintain the conversation with my friend was nearly impossible. all my brain wanted to do was listen to their conversation.

when i go into a shop, i expect that czech will be spoken and i do my best to communicate my needs using my limited czech vocabulary. therefore, when i can successfully accomplish something (for example, ordering a meal) without 1. the person helping me reverting to english (whether it be to practice their english or to help me out) or 2. feeling like i have a blinking sign on my forehead that says "ignorant american," i feel like i blend in. let me tell you, it's a good feeling. i get a big sense of satisfaction when someone asks me for directions as if i am a local. granted, i also feel a bit helpless because i can't truly help them. however, that's not the point. the point is this: over the past 4 months, i have spent so much time and effort trying to blend in. sometimes i am successful, other times i am not.

in some ways, it is important to blend in. for example, adapting to some aspects of the culture is important. i certainly don't want to do something that would be considered rude or offensive. i also don't want to further the ignorant american stereotype. however, there is one very big part of me that i do not want to camouflage in order to fit in with czech culture: my faith. i may live in a spiritually dark area of the world, but i am not here to hide my light under a bushel; i am here to let it shine. matthew 5:14-16 says, "you are the light of the world. a town built on a hill cannot be hidden. neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. in the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven."

this little light of mine, i'm gonna let it shine.

The Ostrava Saga Pt. III

Well, this is embarrassing. I officially fail at providing consistent updates. I would apologize, but I have a feeling that it would come out sounding like a list of lame excuses, so I shall refrain and simply assure you that I intend to do better in the future. One thing I would like to point out to you before charging ahead into this post is the addition of "pages" on my blog. They can be found on the righthand side of my blog. Currently, there are two. One is about Fishnet, the language school I work at, and the other is about my ministry here in Ostrava. I also plan to do another one about why I chose to teach overseas in the first place. The information on these pages will help give some background to my blog posts, so please give them a glance.

Now, without further adieu, I give you: The Ostrava Saga Pt. III: A Change of Plans

Sounds scary, doesn't it? Plans are comfortable. Anyone who knows me well knows that I like to have all my ducks in a row. However, as one friend recently told me, "Want to make God laugh? Tell Him your plans." I entitled this post "a change of plans" for a few reasons. Reason #1: What I was originally going to post in the last part of the saga I instead chose to create pages for. Reason #2? Hold this thought. I'll come back to it later... ;)

I have been here in the Czech Republic for about 3 months now, and the time has flown by so fast. Teaching started on September 6th with business classes, and then public courses started on the 20th. Since then, I have learned that teaching is a full-time job. Even with only 24 teaching hours per week, there are lessons to plan, meetings to attend, and plenty of ministry opportunities to be a part of. Each week is quite full, but in a good way. I wish I could give you a play-by-play of the past two months here, but the truth is, I can't. Besides, your eyeballs would probably fall out attempting to read all about it anyway. However, I can give you some highlights and details of my time here the past two months.

*One of my best friends, Claudia, came to visit me the first week of September. She lives in Germany, and I hadn't seen her in about two years, so it was a great reunion. I felt a bit helpless since I'd only been here for a short time, but we did some exploring in Ostrava and had a lovely time. A few days after the visit, she flew out to Oregon to study for a year at a university in Ashland. There's nothing quite like swapping continents, but I am very excited for Christmas, as she is coming home and has invited me to stay with her and her family in Olbernhau and experience Germany for the first time.

*I never thought I would be a teacher OR work with youth. Boy does God have a sense of humor. After being here and experiencing both of these opportunities, I am pleased to say that I have amazing students and I am altogether in LOVE with this place. God is doing something big here in Ostrava and I feel so blessed to be a part of it. The past few film nights have had an amazing turnout...upwards of 80-90 youth! We meet in the cafe of the church I attend, and there's almost not enough room for everyone now. Also, at the last Young Life club, we had over 50 youth attend. In a country where so many people are tolerant of Christians but remain unbelievers, seeing God working in the hearts of the youth here is such an encouragement to me.

*Around the end of September, I was invited to go to the mountains with one of my students, her husband, and two-year-old son. It was such a wonderful experience of many 1sts, including: my first time picking wild blueberries, my first time truly hiking in the mountains, my first blueberry frgal (boy oh boy is this a delicious pastry), and my first time seeing a real wolf up close. Don't worry...the wolf was actually a domesticated Czechoslovakian wolf (AKA it thought it was a dog) and it was quite friendly. Oh, and of course I supported my team and wore my Notre Dame sweatshirt. Thanks for asking :)

*Arts in the CZ are much more available, not to mention much cheaper. I went with my team in September to see Carmen (for about $8!) at the opera (which was quite an experience, as it's a French opera, set in Spain, and it had Czech subtitles scrolling across a marquis), and I recently saw the ballet Giselle with the same student that I went to the mountains with. There are at least three theatres here in Ostrava, and I look forward to seeing many more shows.

*I had a wonderful experience in the mountains two weeks ago at a Young Life event called Film Weekend. To make a long story short, about 35 kids, not including leaders and a few Fishnet teachers including yours truly, spent an entire weekend watching and discussing films, playing games, and having a grand ol' time. This is of course AFTER hiking up the side of the mountain in the dark and at a practically vertical angle. I'll never think of steep in the same way again. Gotta get myself some hiking boots... I could probably do an entire post on this weekend. Perhaps I shall. Regardless, this was a weekend that I will never forget.

There are many more details and events I could share with you, but this is already getting quite lengthy. However, before I bid you adieu, I will take you back to reason #2. Ha, that rhymed. So, "a change of plans" also refers to my current predicament. When I originally signed on to this adventure across the pond, I only thought of it as a one-year kinda deal. It didn't even really occur to me that I would have the opportunity or desire to stay longer. However, the reality is that 1. I love it here. 2. ESI (my sending organization) wants to know in March whether their teachers plan to stay or return to the states. 3. I am prayerfully considering staying for another year. You might ask, "What is the benefit of staying longer?" or "Isn't one year enough?"

To answer these questions, let me share with you a question that EVERY single student and acquaintance has asked me since I arrived: "How long are you staying?" The people here are so used to people like me coming and then going after one year that they are afraid to truly invest in a relationship if we're only going to be here a short while. I don't blame them. Don't get me wrong, it is possible to build relationships here in one year, but think of what can be done in two. Trust takes time. Therefore, I ask that you keep me in your prayers as I continue this year and contemplate the future. I am not hasty in my decisions, and I don't do this to frighten you. I tell you this so that we can pray together. Plus, I've found that it's better to let the people you care about have time to get used to an idea instead of springing it on them right before a deadline.

I shall end this post with a good quote that I found recently. "Decisions come easier when your will to please God outweighs your will to please the world." -Anso Coetzerny

Thanks for reading and thanks in advance for your prayers. I love you all.

The Ostrava Saga Pt. II

Halt. Have you read The Ostrava Saga Pt. I yet? If not, I would recommend reading it first. Don't worry, I won't come out of the woodwork and hit you over the head with a frying pan if you don't...it's just not the way the saga was intended to be read. Feel free to keep reading. There's no need to put a lock on the door of your pots and pans ;)

The Ostrava Saga Pt. II: Hello Ostrava!

Wow, where do I begin? By now, we've (btw, whenever I say we/we've/our, I mean my team) been here in Ostrava for just over a week. We arrived on Friday, August 20th around 8pm Central European Time. The 6-hour time difference from home didn't prove to be too terrible the first day, but by our second day here, I was really feeling the jet lag. There's nothing like being tired all the time. Yuck. Glad that's over. Thankfully, our time here has been really low-key so far.

Here are some highlights:

*Ostrava City Hall has a viewing tower, so we paid a small fee to see an incredible view of the city. I was silly enough to forget my camera, so here are some pictures (courtesy of my lovely teammate, Shelly McMullen) of the tower itself and some of the views:

Just think, this is only a speck of Ostrava! There is so much more to show you...I just need to think of the best way to do that. Uploading pictures on here isn't really the best option, so I am open to suggestions.

*We went to our first Czech restaurant. It was located in the lower level of a museum, and the 5 of us were literally the only ones there (besides the waitress and the chef, of course). Delicious food. They even had an English menu, which was definitely helpful, though we felt a bit guilty for using it. Since then, though, we've been to three other Czech food establishments and successfully ordered food using a Czech menu.

*I had my very first IKEA experience. We needed a dresser for the flat, so we took the tram (one of the three forms of public transportation here in Ostrava) and visited IKEA. My teammates were extremely ambitious, as they decided it would be no problem to simply transport the dresser back to our flat (aka apartment). Yeah...the dresser weighed 72 lbs. What a day.

*We've been grocery shopping numerous times already (since we have to carry our purchases back to the flat, we can only buy so much). There is a mall near our flat that includes a large TESCO, which is like a Walmart. Shopping there is pretty easy thanks to the fact that we don't usually need to know the Czech word for each item. The deli counter is really the only exception, and even then, the ladies there can usually tell that we're new at this and are therefore pretty patient with us.

*4 of us went to the Cine Star (a movie theatre in the mall by our flat) and saw Inception. Wow. Now there's a movie that will make you think. I'd wanted to see it for awhile, but hadn't had the chance. It showed in English, but with Czech subtitles. Here are some interesting things to note about the movie theatre experience here:

1) When you purchase a ticket, you're actually reserving a particular seat.

2) Therefore, unlike Americans, Czechs don't arrive early to pick their seats. In fact, they don't arrive early at all. When we first entered the theatre, I was worried that we were in the wrong theatre because there were so few people and I knew that most of the seats were already reserved. However, they all showed up during the previews.

3) There's a bar in the lobby of the theatre, but you can't take drinks past the ticket-rippers and into the actual viewing rooms. Not that I tried. Just an observation...

4) There are select seats in the theatre for couples. I was lucky enough to find this out as my seat was right next to a "loveseat." Literally, it's two seats put together. Thankfully, the couple sitting next to me actually wanted to watch the movie.

*We all bought a 3-month transportation pass, which makes for extremely convenient travel via the bus, trolley-bus, and tram here in Ostrava. Yes, we take public transportation to get pretty much everywhere except the Futurum mall (where the TESCO is located, along with lots of shops and a large food court--perfect for when we aren't feeling ambitious in the kitchen) and church.

*Church! We've been to church twice already, and we all love it. It's a Czech Brethren church, and it also happens to be where most of the Fishnet (our school) teachers attend. Hello community :) What's more, we get to listen to the message in English via a large set of headphones as someone in the back translates for us. Yes, we sit in the front and look obviously American because of this. Worship is not translated though, so we all attempt to sing the hymns in Czech. This proves to be very entertaining. I quite enjoy it. It's a great way to practice my Czech pronunciation, even if I have no clue what I'm saying.

Now, you are probably all curious about our flat. Drumroll please. Here's the outside of the building:

We're on the 7th floor (it's really the 6th...but Europeans do things differently). Our flat is right above the orange line, and that's our own balcony. We have lots of windows, so there's plenty of natural light. We love it. Our views are amazing. Plus, there are no window panes, so we get a clear, unobstructed view :) It's a hassle to put pictures on here, so I'll take a video of the flat and give you a nice little tour sometime soon.

I hope you enjoyed seeing a tiny snippet of Ostrava. It's a pretty cool city, and once it stops raining (it's been gray and rainy here for about 5 days), I'll go exploring and take lots of pictures :)

Next up is The Ostrava Saga Pt. III, which will be about our school and what ministry will look like here. Stay tuned!